What Killed Jesus?
If you have ever struggled with God’s love for you, this
should help. Does He care about my stuff? Has He taken away all my sin? Is God
involved in my concerns, stresses, finances and well-being? Yes. Yes. Yes.
5:24am, Friday
April 11, 2014, I woke up from a dream with a different answer to a theological
question than I previously had (see Psalm 16:7). Seven of us from Outlook
Christian Church in Reno were in Redding, CA for Bethel Church's Sozo training.
[Side note: It is amazing how many evangelical church people throw out or
negatively classify as a cult any church that hears from God in a different way
than they do. I also used to do this back when I had perfect theology but never
heard anything from God.]
It didn’t strike me until two days later that this was
one week before crucifixion day. It’s interesting how in dreams and visions
that God simplifies complex things, ideas and uses simple imagery and metaphor
so I can understand what He means. I am only three months into hearing and
seeing things from God, so please be patient with me. Don’t get hung up on
omnipresence and omniscience at the expense of the main point of the dream and
discussion.
I used to teach that Jesus could not be killed and could
not die because, as the second Adam, He as the incarnation, God in the flesh,
made by God as an embryo and implanted in Mary. Jesus was not conceived by human
effort and had no sin; therefore, neither the sperm nor the egg was from a
human. Both Joseph and Mary were born in the line of the first Adam, so neither
one could contribute any physical or spiritual part to the incarnation without
corrupting it with sin. Roman Catholics try to get around this by declaring
Mary free from sin, but that only moves the difficulty back one generation:
then how is she without sin when her parents were not? We don’t know anything
about her parents. Jesus was not conceived in sin. He knew no sin. He had no
sin. He never sinned. So, when He died on the cross it was because He chose
to die at the moment when He gave up His Spirit and surrendered His earthly
body to death. He loved us so much that out of perfect love, He chose the exact
moment for when to die: when it was all finished.
That's pretty good stuff. But I woke up from my dream
with some unique answers and thoughts about the above; then God spoke to me for
two hours sharing with me a different version of things:
What was it like in heaven when the incarnation took
place? (Philippians 2:5-11). The heavenly host are gathered around the massive
throne of God. The Massive, Holy Father is seated on a throne with another
massive throne at His right hand where The Son sits. They are glorious,
majestic, wonderful, powerful, fabulous, extravagant, etc. the Holy Spirit
flies around the room. All three-in-one are glorious, perfect, shining,
exalted. God is holy, holy, holy. Angels worship. There is shouting, singing,
praising, declaring, dancing, flying, bowing. There is awe and wonder.
Everything is amazing! God shines so bright with wonderful colors not even
understandable or explainable to the human eye or mind. Our perspective of the
scene changes often so we can see everything and experience this amazing event
from every angle. The angels mostly look in God's direction. I have no idea
what anyone looks like. I just know I am seeing God and angels. God's throne
has a view of all creation. The entire universe, all of time and every created
thing is in front of Them for Their viewing pleasure. The stars glisten in
celebration of God. They praise Him!
Suddenly something changes. The Holy Spirit leaves the
throne room for a moment, then returns and stops. That’s weird. He’s always
moving. He stands before the throne. He stands tall with His hands held out
fairly wide in front of Him. He holds something tiny in each hand between thumb
and fore-finger. His hands are lifted up near shoulder height. There is
something about His demeanor that quiets the whole room. The angels become
still and quiet with anticipation. Why is He standing still? What is He holding?
Why does His face look so serious, almost somber? Something different is about
to happen in heaven? The angels look around and ask many questions of each
other. What is going on? This just doesn't happen. Then something more
incredible happens.
There is movement on the throne. Jesus stands. That
usually means He is going to do something amazing with creation or
intercession. An excited hush happens in heaven. Two members of the Trinity are
standing and looking at each other! Spectacular! Wonder grips all. The mood of
God is quiet. Angels are confused. This is astounding. What in heaven's name is
going on?
Then Jesus moves in a way He never has before. Heads tilt
in confusion at this new thing. What is He doing? Is He taking off His robe?
It's like He is taking off His glory. Is He taking off His omnipresence? What
is this? He is folding it all up very carefully like a precious garment. The
awe and wonder stuns the room. When He is finished folding it up carefully and
neatly with gentle and tender precision creasing the lines of the fold, He
turns. Slowly, with awe inspiring movement and gracious deliberate love, He
moves to The Father and hands the folded robe of some aspects of His glory to
The Father. It's as if He is going on a journey and He is handing over things
for safe-keeping. What does it mean? Nothing like this ever happened before.
The look on the face of The Father and The Son as they
pause during the transfer is powerful. Nothing is spoken. There are no words
needed. They look deeply at each other with love, compassion, grace, mercy and
respect. God is tender within Himself. This all powerful, terrifyingly
wonderful, extravagantly loving, relentlessly patient and gracious God is
having a gentle moment that is understood as a good-bye on earth, but this has
never happened in heaven. Some are reminded of the only other separation in
heaven, but that was long ago and not good. This one is good.
Jesus leaves the robe to The Father and turns to face The
Holy Spirit. Jesus looks so different now; smaller. It's still the same Jesus,
but He is different in ways the heavenly host do not understand. Jesus and The
Holy Spirit look at each other intensely. There is concern, compassion.
Somehow, even for God and above heaven’s normal level, this is a most sacred
moment! They pause and continue looking deeply into each other and communing
without words.
After a time, The Father nods, then everything changes in
a flash. Jesus blinks slowly and thoughtfully. Everything is in slow motion yet
also at the hyper speed that only God can move. The Holy Spirit starts moving
His hands toward each other and the tiny things in each hand come into view. He
is holding between His thumb and fore-finger a human sperm in one hand a human
egg in the other. As His hands move closer to unite the egg and sperm, Jesus
transforms into something that looks like a vapor and flies toward the hands.
The egg, sperm and Jesus all meet perfectly in unison. Somehow The Incarnation
has just taken place! Many stars explode at the magnitude of the event.
The angels freak! What happened? What is going on? What
does this mean? Why did God do this? Does anybody know what is going on? Hey,
elders; hey, seraphim, what the heaven!?! Angels grab each other to keep from
falling. We have never seen this! What does it mean?
After this new creation, The Holy Spirit gently places
the miracle in the palm of His hand and raises it above His head in
celebration. The Father stands! All heaven bows! The angels hold their
collective breath in wonder and awe. The Father walks! He walks over to The
Holy Spirit. They stare at The Incarnation smiling. Awe. Wonder. Love. Grace.
Peace. Purity. Power. Holiness. They look up at each other. Their eyes meet.
They share a moment where only They know the meaning. Once again The Father
nods. The Holy Spirit turns toward creation and flies toward and into it. He
flies past galaxies and into the earth's atmosphere, into Israel and into the
home of Mary while she is sleeping. He stops, pausing for a moment. Then He
gently takes The Incarnation from His palm grasping Him with a thumb and
forefinger. With precious care His hand moves through Mary's abdomen and He
gently places Jesus into the uterine wall of this young teen virgin. She gasps
lightly as her body reacts to becoming pregnant by being overcome by The Holy
Spirit. She breathes sweetly and returns to a deep sleep. The Holy Spirit takes
a moment to look upon this new mother. He loves her. He loves her Son. (Matthew
1:18-25, Luke 1:26-38). God has become human. Immanuel has arrived.
Fast forward to a different event viewed from heaven:
All of heaven is looking into creation at a hill outside
Jerusalem where The Son is nailed to a cross. Jesus, Whose name means “The Lord
Saves,” is carrying out the work of His name. The Father has been standing throughout this
event of the capture, binding, trial, mocking, blasphemy, torture and
crucifixion of The Incarnation. Mary weeps uncontrollably. Young John weeps
with her. The other disciples and followers are off mourning somewhere else.
The angels weep. Many are prostrate honoring Him. They are shocked. Heaven
wails! The Holy One of God is allowing Himself to be treated this way!? Why
won't He call for us to rescue Him, to defend Him, to destroy and punish His
murderers and accusers? Many angels again grasp onto each other so as not to
fall over in shock. The rocks and ground cry out in agony as their Creator
suffers. Why? Why is this happening? Why would The Father only watch? Why does
Jesus stay there? He could stop all this instantly, but does nothing. Why?
Time seems to stand still in heaven as this horror
unfolds. Demons celebrate with mockery and hatred all over Golgotha, Jerusalem,
Israel and the earth. They are not allowed anywhere near The Throne-room during
this. How can this be? How can Holy Spirit and Father merely watch? This is
insane. It's not logical. Psalm 22 & Isaiah 53 scream in agony. This is
travesty beyond all belief. How is this fair? How can this be good?
John 3:16 “For God
so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes
in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send the Son
into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through
Him.”
The Father walks from the throne toward creation. The
angels clear a path. He is highly exalted in worship even now, during this. He
stretches out His hands spread wide in front of Him. He reaches into creation.
All of heaven is wide-eyed with wonder watching intently. What is He doing? All
of time inside creation is revealed before Him. His hands turn with His
gigantic palms pointed toward each end of creation and each end of time all at
once. His hands flex and begin to vacuum all of mankind's wickedness toward
Himself. He pulls all sin from beginning to the end of time into a huge sphere.
It is horrible. It stinks. It is disgusting and repulsive. Vile! It cannot
touch Him. There is some distance between the sphere of sin and His
outstretched hands. With one hand He moves the sphere across galaxies toward
the cross. This is all so filthy and vile. Stars die instantly and black holes
form as sin passes these once beautiful stars. He continues stretching out His
hand moving the sphere closer and closer to Jerusalem and the cross where His pierced
Son hangs. The sphere shrinks in size but magnifies in density and awfulness.
Finally The Dear Father, Abba, places the sphere onto and into His Son. The
agony everywhere is loud with pain and atrocity. Jesus screams. His body shakes
under the terrible weight. His skin tears further. Jesus screams in agony as He becomes sin. As He dies for our sin,
He becomes separated from His Father for the only time in all eternity. “Eli,
Eli, lama sabachthani?” that is, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?”
(Matthew 27:46). Jesus is isolated from all. He is completely alone; even in,
His Own creation.
The Father pulls His hands back outside of creation. He
stands lonely inside the throne room. Heaven is confused and weeping. Where is
The Holy Spirit during all this, they wonder? He is comforting those mourning
on earth. The Father turns away from The Son. His face is marked with personal
pain. For the first time in heaven; the only moment in heaven—in all of
eternity, The Father cannot face and love The Son, Who has become sin for us.
Oh, the wrath! Oh, the guilt, shame, sin, suffering, sorrow! This is wrong!
This is not fair! The Father walks away
from The Son. He stands facing the throne. His head is down. He places one
hand on His throne and one on His Son's. The Father is also in agony and pain.
Is that a tear on His face? It is torture for each member of the triune God.
They have always been One. Now they are two. All the Father's punishment of and
wrath for sin has been poured out on His Son Who has now BECOME sin.
2 Corinthians 5:21
He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become
the righteousness of God in Him.
All the followers of God throughout time look at Jesus on
the cross and are thankful for their salvation and forgiveness. They are amazed
at the price paid for them. But many struggle with forgiving others. “Jesus,
it’s great that you died for me. But you cannot die for _______, remember how
they wounded me!? They robbed, raped, killed, burned, physically & verbally
abused. They lied, stole, cheated, disrespected, dishonored, perverted,
abandoned. They are not worthy of forgiveness—ever! It’s not right or fair that
you would take their punishment. They need to suffer themselves.” God is
silent.
Light disappears from Israel. It is complete darkness. On
earth only a week before, the rocks would have cried out in praise if the
people had not. Today, they cry in pain and the earth quakes in agony for its
Maker. Jesus became sin. My sin, our sin, all sin came between The Father and
The Son. Jesus screams and dies as He yields up His Spirit to death in human
form. The Holy Spirit rips from top to bottom the veil into the Holy of Holies.
The horror placed on The Son opens the door for the people of earth to enter
The Kingdom. Rocks are split. Tombs are opened. Dead holy people resurrect and
enter the holy city appearing to many people! The Son of God is DEAD. (Matthew
27:45-54).
He did not choose His moment to die and merely allow His
human body to experience death as I used to think and teach. It was much worse
than that. When The Father placed sin on Him and Jesus became sin, He was no
longer holy. All the wrath of God’s anger upon sin and sinners was placed on
Him. All the punishment that sin deserved was placed on Him. He received the
penalty for ALL sin. He paid the price for ALL sin. He had no choice. He was no
longer in control. The punishment for sin took over as He suffered the wrath of
The Father for all humanity. He gasped under the weight of it all. He felt weak,
frail, forsaken, lonely, abandoned, forlorn, hopeless and terrified. He became
scared of death. He was separated from The Father and all of heaven. He lost
communion and communication with His Father. He could no longer hear God.
Everything horrible ever thought, said or done was placed on Him. And He
experienced ALL of it all by Himself in human form! Utter isolation and
loneliness. Was this worse than hell? Jesus wept alone.
Does God love you?
How much? The above should illustrate how loved by each
member of the Trinity you are. God powerfully demonstrated His love for you
(Romans 5:6-11). The Father Himself loves you (John 16:27).
After He died for our sin, He rose from the grave,
returned to heaven and sat back down on His Throne fully clothed in all His
glory wearing all His divinity and majesty, but He is changed and has scars. He
knows everything we go through and can sympathize with us perfectly (Hebrews
4:14-16). Can you imagine the celebration when He returned?! I can. Can you
feel the excitement in heaven when He returned to The Father as risen Savior
and Lord of ALL? Can you imagine the embrace and love shared by our triune God?
Sometimes now He will rise from His throne in order to intercede for us (Romans
8:34)!
Fast forward to today. We live long after the
resurrection. We do not live bound by the sin we had before the cross. We get
the peace and wonder of living in resurrection life with the indwelling and
empowering of The Holy Spirit. We are made new because of His love and how
Jesus was killed. We have a new ministry. We are changed (Romans 6, 2
Corinthians 5:14-6:3). Let these truths melt away and destroy your temptations,
struggles, concerns, fears, worries, doubts and difficulties. Receive the fruit
of your true Repentance. Rejoice. Reconcile. Receive and give love freely and
abundantly.
Do you realize that you are the joy set before Him as Jesus
endured the cross (Hebrews 12:1-3)? Grace and peace are yours abundantly!
Happy Easter forever!
